The leaves are changing colors. The seasons are changing.
Are you changing?
Am I?
I sure hope so.
Change is necessary for growth but some people resist it like it is the plague. Franklin Roosevelt once said “there are many ways of going forward but only one way of standing still”. I memorized that quote many years ago and it still pops in my head when it dawns on me that I am resisting some change in my life. It is all too easy to simply resort to the same comforting responses when a new challenge presents itself. Some of us really enjoy life on our comfy couches!
As a Lake Girl, I see people fishing all of the time. At 5am, I hear the first fishing boats zip by the cottage. Maybe the early bird really does get the worm. By the time, I am drinking my first cup of tea, with my feet perched on the railing overlooking the water, the first of many boaters are directly in front of our house casting their rods. I don’t know if the locals just have a sense of where the fish hang out or if they chat about their last great catch in front of the gray cottage with the orangish trim. But the water just in front of our cottage is a popular spot!
Enjoying me morning tea!
I was a vegetarian for over 20 years and didn’t eat fish for most of that time. As I didn’t eat fish, it likely comes as no surprise that I didn’t go fishing for sport or leisure. I still don’t go fishing and get a bit squeamish just thinking about putting a worm on the hook or touching the fish that foolishly ate the worm. I don’t really get fishing at all. But I admire fishermen and women who pursue their sport with such enthusiasm and perseverance.
As an Occupational Therapist, I tend to notice when people are fully engaged in an activity. Fishing seems to bring this out in people. From my observations, when people fish for fun (and hopefully dinner too) they have no desire to be anywhere else. They are relaxed, enjoying the day, quietly conversing with their friends. Fishing is a simple pleasure and seems to bring out some good qualities in people.
It doesn’t matter if they are in a big, flashy boat a little row boat, or a kayak. It doesn’t matter if they are sitting on a comfy chair, a wooden deck or standing up to their waist in the water. They cast their rod and let the water and the waves do their thing. At some point, they reel it in and do it all over again. To me, it gives meaning to the idea of being in the flow of an activity.
No worries!
Saturday on my way to work at 7am, I watched a guy walking through the town carrying his fishing pole in the rain. He was likely headed to the river and a little rain was not going to deter him from doing what he loved. Fishermen and women don’t melt! They don’t let a drizzle or cloudy sky ruin their fun.
When I lived in Gloucester, I remember watching a guy riding his bike carrying a big fish in one hand and his fishing pole in the other. To me, this looked tricky and hard but he was simply bringing his daily catch home for dinner. He was smiling from ear to ear. This guy wasn’t letting the fact that something was hard deter him from what he needed to do.
I have seen guys cast their rod and immediately get their line caught in a tree or a branch. They calmly take care of the problem and as soon as possible, cast again and continue to fish. I don’t think I have ever seen a fisherman get angry or upset or even curse at such an event. It is like small annoyances are just taken in stride because they can’t be avoided.
I routinely see people catch a fish, calmly reel it in and immediately toss it back because it is too small. They do this hour after hour, patiently waiting for the big one. Yes, fishermen, women and kids learn patience!
Skill building…
The next time you have something planned and the weather isn’t perfect; grab a raincoat and do it anyway. You won’t melt.
The next time you find yourself in a tough situation – like catching a big ole fish and having to carry it home while riding your bike – just put a smile on your face and do what needs to be done! Think of it as character building.
When dealing with the same small problems over and over again like an annoying co-worker, the Xerox machine getting jammed, or the meeting that just won’t end – you can get frustrated and lose your cool or you can think like a fisherman. Simply take that small fish off the hook and toss it back into the water and get back to your task at hand.
If you are feeling stuck in a rut – try changing your perspective by thinking like a fisherman!
How many times have I said these 5 little words; “I could never do that?” I have said those 5 little words more times than I care to remember. How about you? All to often, it is easier to put up fences than to risk embarrassment, easier to not even try than to risk failure.
A few days ago I saw a few glimpses of spring when I decided to do a bit of raking and yard clean up. I packed up 6 bags of yard debris and stuck them in the garage. I saw the day lilies sporting some greenery and the crocuses popping out of the ground. I heard the cardinals, robins and blue jays singing away.
This morning though, I peered out my window and saw evidence that winter has not released its grip on Central New York. I saw a light coating of snow everywhere and my outdoor work was cancelled due to the cold. The temperature currently reads 40 degrees but the wind chill says otherwise. So I put those 6 bags filled with leaves, sticks and dead stalks out to the curb while the wind whipped and the snow fell. Mother Nature needs to make up her mind!
Back in February in a post titled “Don’t Just Go Through the Motions”, I shared my goals for 2018. My goals are recorded on 3 notes on my Google Keep Page under the titles Health Goals, Wealth Goals and Happiness Goals. My Google Keep Page come up automatically every time I turn on my computer. This way, my goals are always accessible for me to review. My Google Keep Page contains 2 other notes related to my goals. One is where I record the next steps I need to take to reach my goals and the other contains reminders to prioritize my goals.
One note is titled “Sculpt My Life – Next Steps”. This is where I write down the next steps I need to take toward reaching my goals. Periodically, I review my goals and figure out the next step for each and jot that down on this list. The second note is titled “My Strategic Life Reminders”. This is where I jot down helpful advice I have read about or heard about that I think will help me in my pursuit of health, wealth and happiness goals. They are reminders to prioritize what I say is important to me. Currently, this list contains the following 3 bullet points:
What 1 thing do I want to get better at today? What opportunities will I have to practice it? Do it every day…
You are never going to feel like it
Act on ideas within 5 seconds or you will pull the emergency brake
I have spent some time and energy over the last few days aimlessly tidying up. Looking through my belongings and boxing up things to donate. Scouring through my closet and drawers to see what is taking up space without ever being used. I have a bag of clothes, a pile of books and a box of stuff ready to get rid of on my back porch. I have vacuumed and swept and dusted various surfaces in my house and car.
Another box of stuff to donate
While cleaning out stuff today, I came upon my notes from reading The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success by Deepak Chopra. Here are two quotes that I wrote down.
“Every single problem that you have in your life is the seed of an opportunity for some greater benefit.
When your preparedness meets opportunity, the solution will spontaneously appear.”
I have been hanging out in Florida this week with Mother Fran and Child #7. The weather has been ok but regardless, it has been nice to get away from the cold and the snow. They live in what feels like a pretty congested area with busy roads full of traffic and every store you can think of within a 10 minute drive. Usually I would hate this type of area but they have something I crave with every ounce of my being. They live on the water. Don’t get too excited, it isn’t the ocean or even a lake; they live on a small pond. They share the pond with a bunch of other houses, each one faces the pond with their back porch.
Mom’s back porch is screened in and the entire thing overlooks the pond. It has a table and chairs, small couch and comfy chair. You can also walk out the porch door and set up a lounge chair on the grass when the need overtakes you. You can’t swim in this pond or even toss in your kayak (apparently that is frowned upon) but people do fish and enjoy the view.
Do you know what it feels like to be stuck in a rut? Every day seems the same and the Joy Meter is reading empty. I hate when I get stuck like this. It is a gnawing feeling in my gut and an emptiness in my mind. I go through the motions of living but in reality I am just trying to get through each and every day. I think that in order to get out of the rut, we have to do something different. We have to step out of our comfort zones and take a small step in the direction we want to be going.
It doesn’t necessarily have to be something huge but it has to be out of character. It has to be something that makes you think, feel, believe just a little bit differently than you do when stuck in the rut.
The holidays are over and winter stretches ahead like a long, dark, daunting tunnel with only 1 exit. I can choose to keep my head low, plod along muttering about the arctic cold and wind or I can sit back and enjoy the warmth of the fireplace and the good company I keep. I remind myself frequently that my perspective on any given situation makes all of the difference. If my perspective does not keep me on the path I have chosen then it is time to change it!
Work has been slow for the last week which is no big deal, however I have to stop myself from getting anxious about an upcoming tiny paycheck. When I don’t work a typical 9-5 gig it is easy to lose focus, forget why I work per diem instead of harnessing the security of a full-time job.
I have been on vacation for the last 1.5 weeks visiting Mother Fran and Child #7 in sunny Florida. I usually visit in February at which point in time, I am desperate to get away from Upstate NY and the frigid winter temperatures. We didn’t have any snow to speak of when I departed but it was cold and getting away was just what the doctor ordered.
I miss the beach already!
Child #7 works really long hours this time of year so I didn’t get to spend much time with her. I did however get lots of quality time with Mother Fran. We shopped, went to a nature preserve, read in the sun and played lots of Canasta. We watched football, assembled her new patio furniture, weeded the garden and played more Canasta. Mother Fran may be 90 but she still has plenty of interests to keep her engaged. I want to be like Mother Fran as I age!
Remember a few weeks ago when I wrote about having written a letter to a friend expressing my gratitude for her having such a positive influence on me when I was growing up? Well I got to see her twice this week and she mentioned that letter a few times. She said it was the nicest thing anyone had ever said to her!
The fact that I not only felt grateful to her but shared my gratitude with her obviously made her day. Not only did expressing gratitude make me feel good, it made her feel good as well. That is a WIN-WIN in my book.
This seems like a good time of year to express gratitude!
This is the holiday season, don’t quarantine your gratitude! Let someone know how important they are to you. When I get home from my December vacation, I plan on writing another letter to an old boss who was an incredible mentor to me in my early 20’s. She deserves to know that I am thankful for the positive influence she has had on my life! We don’t speak often but I know our friendship is important to both of us and the longer we go without talking, the harder it is to pick up the phone.
I wish everyone a Merry Christmas, Happy Chanukah, Mappy Chrisukah and Happy Holidays! I hope each and every one of you are spending the holiday season in a manner that maximizes health, wealth and happiness. I will be hanging out with Child #1 and her honey eating yummy food, playing games and enjoying family time. Life is Good in My Little Blue Kayak!
